BlisteringSh33p

On The Outside, Looking Out

I don't know how it appears to others, but here's how I describe most of my life and my personal tastes. For a lot of my life, when I've had to make some decision about a direction to take, something new to try, what music to listen to, it seems that I've consciously chosen the option that I thought would be least popular. Not reprehensible; different. Just trying to come up with a unique combination. I've never felt that I fit in very good anywhere or with any particular group. So I would try to make sure that I couldn't fit in.
I don't know how sad that is; it's hard for me to objectively think about. Was it a desperate attempt by some kid to differentiate himself in a sea of conformity? Was it narcissism taken to an extreme? Have I changed yet? Am I trying to make it seem more important than it ever was? Just how fake am I? How can I ever even answer that one?

posted by Sh33p @ 04:37